As we go through life we are confronted, rather regularly, by decisions which will alter the course of our individual and collective futures. We must make them. And we must commit to follow-through on the choices and decisions we decide to make. It would be naive to expect to, or assume that we could, go through life without ever having to make any hard decisions. The question, then, is not whether or not we should prepare for such a moment, but how. THE choice of life, however, is not WHAT decision we make but HOW and WHY we make it.
It is in passing through the harder moments of life, in deciding our next step, that we have the most potential for positive growth and change. Whenever we find ourselves lacking decisions to make we will surely discover ourselves living well within our comfort zones. Within our comfort zones we can easily live a life of comfort for a time. Sometimes this comfort is not even found in our circumstances, or the quality of our lives, but rather in our comfort level accepting things as they are. With prolonged comfort comes atrophy. It is as predictable as it is known that light will always chase away darkness.
With time new decisions will be presented us and the easy comfort of our lives will be challenged. We will be pushed towards a decision of some kind. This decision will teach us about ourselves. It will teach us about what really matters to us in our hearts. It may be deciding between jobs, careers, relationships, housing arrangements, schooling direction, or any one of a million other things. These decisions define our lives in the moments we make them.
For those of us who like life to be comfortable remember that life is good at only giving us comfort for so long. Change will inevitably come and with it we will be presented with a series of new decisions. It is in the moment of decision that we forge our fate and determine our destiny.
Second, let me ask you a question. What will you make of your life in that moment of decision? What fate would you forge as you determine your destiny by virtue of the decision you make?
THE CHOICE I speak of is not one of options but one of destination, one of BEING, one of BECOMING.
Will you make decisions which will lead you towards the destiny you seek to create in your life, ultimately leading you towards being the person necessary to achieve such a destiny?
Third I want you to consider this: Is it possible to spend your whole life reaching towards something and never get there? Yes, it is… But, IF we strive to BE the person necessary to achieve our dream and destiny then no matter what happens we will be confident in the fact that we have decided to forge our fates and determine our destiny in the right way… we will know, in that moment, that we are the people we sought to become.
While our fates and our destinies are determined to large extent by our own actions they are also determined by the worlds we grew up in, our environments, and our surroundings (including the people around us). This has been shown in many examples throughout history. I will use a well-known example.
The Jews, before being pushed into the concentration camps in Germany, were living their lives moving towards a dream and destiny they considered worthy of their time, talents and abilities. They were striving to become better and do more with their lives. But due to the world they grew up in, their environment, and the people around them their fates were altered. This had nothing to do with their own actions. But, even then, in the middle of their trials and hardships they still had a choice. They could still BE the people they knew themselves to be (I think of Viktor Frankl in A Man’s Search for Meaning) and live their destiny out in their hearts. The Jews could not alter their circumstances at the time but they could alter how they responded to them. They could still choose to respond to them as the people they sought to BE would have and thus BECOME something greater because of it.
The moral of today is in seeing that THE REAL CHOICE which lies before us is this: Who we are is much more important than what we accomplish.
While it is true that BECOMING the person who is required to achieve something on the inside first is the surest way to achieve it – that is still not the whole story. It is no guarantee as there are many other factors at play. So remember that when life seems to defy your every action and you know that you are still on the proper path; carry on, continue on your journey and continue to BECOME the person inherently capable of achieving your dream, forging your fate, and determining your destiny. The worth of our decisions and choices should not be determined by what we accomplish in life but by careful consideration of WHO and WHAT we BECOME as result.
In conclusion I ask you to read this quote I recently saw and take it to heart…
“If you don’t like the road you are walking, start paving another one.”
Now I ask you to adapt it and apply it to your own life and the decisions placed before you…
If you don’t like the character you are forging, start forging another one.
The most important decisions you make in your lifetime will be the ones you make about who you become. These decisions will be manifest in the motivating factors behind each and every decision you make. If you like what you see continue on your way… and if you don’t like what you see – Change It.